DAY 1-Already? awwww maaannnnnnn

So when I wrote my first post I was thinking I had all this time to go out and enjoy the yummy foods I would no longer be eating. This really isn't the best mindset when starting something like this, but we like to torture ourselves. With the holidays, time sure went fast.  Here we are day one of our journey.  It may not seem like I am excited for this (mainly by my title to this blog) but I really am.  I am so excited to get back down to my high school weight, or as close as I can get. I'm excited to get my energy back and to feel better than I do now. From experience I can tell you, what you eat can change all of these things.

Lazy and I spent the last few days preparing for this day.  How you might ask? Well we are really glad you asked! We started out at Chilis.  We had the queso bean dip with chips and salsa and guac. She wasn't hungry (so much for that bottomless pit Lazy! hah! I so out-consumed you on this meal!) I then ordered a quesadilla (Cheese and gluten oh and Bacon, I'm going to miss bacon). 

Cake. Fresh out of the oven with ice-cream. Heaven.

Then after all this food I decided I really needed to push it over the top: so the babies and I enjoyed a Red-Velvet Chocolate cake together.  On a side note- I am not that big of a fan of red-velvet cake, but Lazy Ass is. I wanted her to suffer for making me eat dessert all alone, so she sat there the whole time watching the four of us eat her favorite dessert. She has great will power! I think in the same situation I would have cracked. Man it was delicious.

Yes, all this food is MINE. All Mine

Then yesterday morning I get this text from Lazy letting me know that she thought we needed to go to a blow-out farewell to unhealthy eating breakfast.  Restaurant of choice: Ihop. So the fam met up for breakfast/brunch and I started looking over the menu.   I told myself I had to go for unhealthy.  Something I would most likely never eat again, at least not for the next 28 days. I finally settled on the Bacon Cheese and Tomato Omelet, which came with 3 pancakes. I switched the normal ones out for the Cinnamon apple ones. I also ordered myself a side of bacon. Have I mentioned that I am REALLY going to miss bacon? Here is what I ate.  Although this time, I'm pretty sure Lazy out ate me.  It was actually hard to finish all this food. Don't worry- I did it.

On my menu today will be the start of bland foods. And I am excited to see them. For those of you that do not have us on Facebook, Lazy Ass shared the link to her first blog post with this message attached to it:

"So, I'm going to die(t). Okay, not diet, change my lifestyle. I'm going to eat right, exercise and just be healthier over all. Okay, maybe I will die. This is the blog my sister in law and I have started to document (read: laugh at) our journey. She's a lot funnier than I am. She also sticks to things better than I do so there may be moments I'm eating cake while she's working out. Fine, rice cakes. If you're lucky, there might even be bikini pictures... okay, maybe you wont be so lucky to see those. Hell, I don't even like looking in the mirror. Anyways, as always, my posts are not child friendly, uber religious friendly or for those with heart conditions or are pregnant. Okay, you can look if you're pregnant but if you go into labor, you better name the kid after me. Boy or girl, doesn't matter."

I told you she was much funnier than I am.  Now so many funny comments came from this but I wanted to take a moment to share one of mine. 

"I'm thinking Sunday is going to be great to start. I'm going to be so hungover the idea of food will make me barf. Nothing says cleanse like barfing."

Honestly that was my game plan.  To eat and drink as much as I could so when I woke up I would have no desire to ever eat or drink anything on the no-no list again. How did it work? Well when at the store last night I picked up some thing for last night, and some things for today.  For last night I got two type of cookies ( the chewy Chips-ahoy, and the  keebler cookies that are shaped like a doughnut and have chocolate dripped over them), I bought chips and dip and we planned on getting a pizza to be our "healthy" dinner before all the snacks.  Oh and there was booze. Lots of booze.  I was drinking wine and champagne last night.  My goal was to eat every last chip and cookie, drink both bottles of wine and champagne. I sadly did not meet this goal.  However I did reach my other goal.  I was not feeling so great last night after my binge eating. Although it could have also been the last 3-4 days of binge eating.

I am about to go off to try to get down the enormous GB-LV and antiox pills. I'm hoping my whale doesn't reject them and make me choke or anything.  I think it's scared. Last night I had a dream about swimming and a whale showed up and we were all happy swimming together then it just took off like it was scared. Well then I actually took off in my dream too cause there was a shark.  So maybe this is all really irrelevant. But I would like to think that shark was this cleanse, and my whale-twin was running scared!

Fatty's Day 1 Meal Plan

Breakfast

-GB-LV & Antiox Pills

-Hot water, a pinch of cayenne pepper, fresh squeezed Lemon (Yes I know this sounds disgusting, and it really is. Start with a little pepper and work your way up each day to a full pinch.  This helps to jump start your metabolism.)

-Banana

Snack

-Handful of raw nuts

Lunch

-Home made taco Salad (ground turkey, lettuce, olives, tomatoes)

Snack

-Carrots

Dinner

- GB-LV &Antiox Pills

-Chicken

-Brown Rice

-Steamed Broccoli

So I'm sure you're all wondering at this point HEY FATTY! Where are these before pictures and weigh-ins?! I was hoping to wait until Lazy Ass gets her butt out of bed so we can post them at the same time, in the same post. As soon as we get them together we will post! I know you are all anxiously awaiting to see us in all our glory. You will not have to wait too much longer!